“Anyone who knows me can tell you that in my world, ‘let’s share a fun fact!’ is roughly equivalent to ‘let’s take a field trip to hell on a paratransit bus!’ Oh, wait. That’s redundant.”
“Well, friends, before you die just thinking about fun fact circles, today I am sharing a fun fact about myself that I think is pretty neat: I can pee out of my belly!”
“The Mitrofanoff procedure, in a nutshell, involves the creation of a channel between the bladder and the surface of my skin. The channel is created using an unlikely hero, the appendix, which has been repurposed from uncool, rejected vestige organ to nifty pee tunnel.”
“In short, due to my disability, I can’t transfer to the toilet independently. That means a lot of waiting around and wiggling while waiting for an assistant, a lot of pee anxiety, and about 43213421 people seeing me sans pants.”
“I have neurogenic bladder, meaning that my brain and bladder are basically drunk texting each other.”
“In my case, I did not need an augmentation, because as the urologist put so eloquently, ‘you have a really big bladder.’ I’ll be adding this special trait to my resumé, as I’m sure it is prized by employers worldwide.”
“You find out who your people are when you’re peeing your sheets and receiving emails from the chuck sheet company encouraging you to take a quiz about which color diaper matches your personality (yes, really…and I know you were curious, so, purple!)”
“But it feels indescribably good to have more freedom (peedom?) and privacy as I navigate life on wheels.”
This week on the Weekly Wisdom blog, I’m sharing this humorous piece from Kathleen Downes. Ms. Downes blogs about her life in a “squeaky purple wheelchair.” She shares her experience having a Mitrofanoff procedure to increase her independence in toileting.
